the Prayer for a Righteous Death

[To be read three times successively]

O, Bon Lwa and the souls of the Gede, surrounding the hearts of the living, knowing compassion and the seats of wisdom, possessing perfected vision and perfected love, come to this place in this time and accept this offering of spirit!

O, Kindly Ones, founts of pristine cognition, origins of immediate and powerful action, come to this place and this time and grant me comfort in this my moment of death!

O, Gran Petro, I (say name) am leaving this world and journeying to other shores. I am cast off from this world and approaching the great transition of death. Suffering deeply, I am without friend, without refuge, a protector or companion. My perception of this life is quickly fading away. I am moving to another world, dark and unfathomable. Entering this forest of doubt I shall be driven by the potency of my sin. I will enter the great wilderness, be borne away upon the great ocean, be driven on by the vital winds of my past actions. Beneath my feet there is no longer firm earth, I have entered a great battlefield, been seized by the malevolent forces of fear and terror upon meeting the executors of your unfailing justice. In accord with the actions of this life I am made powerless to resist a foolish rebirth. The time has come and I have no choice but to move on, alone, leaving dear friends behind.

O, Kindly Ones, grant refuge to me, (say name), who is now without refuge! Protect me! Be my companion! Defend me from the great darkness of death! Turn back the whirlwind of my sin and ignorance! Protect me from my fear and terror of your unfailing justice! Rescue me from the long and terrible roads into perdition!

O, Bon Lwa, be unsparing in your compassion! Grant me strength! Do not permit me another foolish or base rebirth! Without sparing justice, swiftly release the power of your embrace!

O, Gran Petro and the souls of the Gede, be unsparing towards me, (say name), with your empathy, skillful means and ability! Obsess and possess me with your compassionate embrace! Do not permit me to fall under the power of my ignorance and sin!

O, you three First Souls, protect us from the sufferings of our living death!

Kittens

There is a new cat in the house. A black and grey tortoise-shell. Still counting age in months although I have no idea how many, she just showed up here. Climbed through the window and made herself at home. Cats are everywhere, the cliche of venus in leo made universal truth. Whats left for a mars ruled dude to do when his planet hits cancer? Watch a kitten act like an idiot.

A tortoise-shell showed up once before, far enough back that I didn't know the astrology of the times. Deep in my saturn return. In some ways its a fearful omen. It means that somehow I am again deep into it. I remember the last time vividly and it is recorded in the gnostic piece 'Six Days in Sodom' which describes my confrontation with the devil of a 14th century heretical exorcism (CLM 849). Good stuff that was the product of some evil times in my life.

Its when the shit is hitting the fan that people seek out the services of the bokors. So a bokor has to be able to work while the shit is hitting the fan. Sometimes that means getting deep into it. That's why there are so many grimoires. Necessity. This round I see a daemon of the grimoire traditions, a duke named Gramary (Gremory, Gamori), everywhere I look. Whats more she courts my attention and I find it impossible to find fault with her. I mentioned this last night to V and she said, "ya, her name means glamour. In the Feri magic sense of the word. So you see whatever she wants you to see." That caused a pause in my consideration of this daemon which allowed me to finally conceive of the tremendous danger hidden in this spirit.

You absolutely must be able to penetrate her glamours in your continuous observation of the world beyond you. Seeing what you want to see leads to an unimaginative, limiting and impractical praxis. In its most destructive forms it is paranoia and delusion. With glamour you have to turn the dynamic around to really benefit from it. You want the world to see whatever they want in you. Real talent in glamours is pretty rare, and it has a very steep learning curve as far as the old magics go. I have never gotten it exactly right. The contemporary daemon I have encountered that are masters of it are as I mentioned earlier, tremendously dangerous. I speak from experience here. When the orange and black tortoise-shell came those years ago, the great devil within the exorcism was Satanachia. In the old hierarchies, the Grand Duchess and a Lieutenent to Lucifer. She too could make me see whatever she wanted me to see. I remain to this day deeply frightened of Satanachia, my grand mal. Always take saturn seriously, or it will fuck you up.

Saturns energy isn't traditionally equated to the duchies, but libra very much is and that's where saturn is headed. Out of virgo and into libra. So it goes like this. The Grand Mal(saturn)+Venus-rulership(libra)=Duchess of Hell, Gramary. Already a space has been created for her. Her sigil chalked out on the floor and marked with candles and offerings of cigarettes and perfumed oils. Already she has reunited lost lovers, and seduced men and women into acts of daring romance. Thus far she has asked nothing of me. No fetish or ritual or sacrifice. Nothing.

But there is a tortoise-shell kitten.