Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Prophecies of the Doom Fairy, pt. VI

Astrology for Whores and Hustlers

(3:55PM, April 19, 2011)

Miss me?  Didn’t think so.

Everything is going to be better because mercury is about to go direct right?  WRONG.  You will probably feel better though, around Sunday you will feel newly empowered and like clarity has returned.  And Venus will have transited into Aries and in a very real sense you will in fact be newly empowered but clarity has not returned it just seems like it has, while you have been knocking back and forth between explosive revelatory insight and horrified, fearful self-pity the great powers-that-be have been moving their pieces. 

Venus is dressed for Aries by some thoroughly wrathful stars, things like nuclear fallout will become naked realities for the Pacific Rim.  Welcome to the new world, Venus wears a hazmat suit.  Sometimes the world is full of terror, sometimes Venus is a pestilential biatch that brings disease, madness and violence.  She is about to point out to everyone (this is why Mercury is waiting for her in the midst of the war and wreckage of Aries) everything that quite frankly will not do and she is going to do it with the pointed cruelty that only Venus can deliver.

The Industrialized West just got way more expensive, will keep getting more expensive for about another three or four weeks.  Invest in private healthcare companies along the west coast and bottled water (like the companies that bottle it I mean).  It isn’t going back to what it was before this time.  Uranus is parked on Aries most critical degree and that fucker is there to stay.  American commodity speculators (the asshole-still-unregulated-banks) are sitting on millions of barrels of oil in unloaded tankers off the coast of the States, they won’t unload until the price per barrel hits its ceiling.  Essentially, to compensate for the undervalued American dollar they are intentionally driving up the cost of oil in America.   It’s your banks that are robbing you (again), not OPEC.

Meanwhile, the Oil Royalties of the middle east that comprise OPEC are also going to fuck the Industrialized West because Britain, America and the EU publicly backed the popular overthrow of Mubarak in Egypt.  That singular act was a betrayal of more than 50 years of alliance between the West and the oil producing nations of OPEC and the Saudi’s said so.  Now when your banks stockpile sweet crude so that they can bomb Libya (source of sweet crude used to make gasoline) and tell OPEC to up production of oil to drive down market value so they can keep their cheap gas and enormous profit margins OPEC is going to say no.  In fact they already did, they said if you got a ton of unloaded ships full of oil you bought at pre-collapse prices then you don’t need any more oil.

In other words the American dollar is not going to rebound and everything in N. America (perhaps the Industrialized West as a whole) will now be that much more expensive.  Venus will impose the true cost of western excess upon us, so save up those dollars you found in unexpected places over the last few weeks.  Gas, food and travel (over the next two months) will become considerably more expensive, then two tiered internet access and healthcare (over the next two years) to make up the shortfall.  

Without support from the West for the populist uprisings in the Middle East (which has already been withdrawn because of its impact on oil commodities) those which have not already succeeded will decay into an excuse to smuggle guns into an already troubled region.  Also, record setting storms and extreme weather and a heightening of tectonic activity because really, we deserve it.

If you’re not already a gangster or a prostitute you might want to think about a career change.  That’s a real pretty mouth you have.


  1. Wait... How long is Uranus staying in Aries, exactly?

  2. To summarize, we're fucked. Yeah, already feelin' it, my friend.

  3. I can't tell you how much this post appeals to me.

    Not because you're correct (even though you are) but because of how you came to these conclusions.

    PS - still buy commodities. There's good, safe margin in "buy high, sell higher". If you can stomach being part of the problem, that is.

  4. "Also, record setting storms and extreme weather and a heightening of tectonic activity because really, we deserve it. " I concur. Another good Piece. Thanks Mr. Valentine.